WHY WE RESIST CHANGE, EVEN WHEN WE KNOW IT’S GOOD FOR US.
We resist change because we’re afraid of the unknown. Even though we might be unhappy with our current situation, at least we know what we’re getting. There aren’t any surprises, so we choose to just settle. We’re so used to a certain way of living that we’d rather stay as we are then take a leap to make a change. Because what change brings is uncertainty and that uncertainty is where the fear for change generates from.
So why do we resist change if it is supposed to grow us into better versions of ourselves? We resist it because we’re obsessed with this idea of timing. We don’t want to make any rash decisions. We overthink and over analyse making a move on someone. We don’t consider career changes because it throws us off the course we’ve put ourselves on to get to a certain age so we can call ourselves a success. We make excuses about why we aren’t able to start or re write our next chapter today because we feel like there’s always a tomorrow. We tell ourselves we have plenty of time to figure things out, to do things the right way, so we end up procrastinating. Don’t get me wrong, in a sense, you do have time to figure it all out, but when you start using that as an excuse not to action intentions, that’s when it becomes procrastination and we end up putting things off and letting opportunities pass us by.
We’re creatures of habit and even though we crave that sense of adventure, we also crave consistency and with consistency comes stability. We spend all this time building ourselves up to get into this comfortable position that makes us not want to uproot our lives or make and kind of changes that would disrupt that level of comfort. Our lives are difficult enough, so why would we want to make it any harder when we could just continue living a comfy, cozy existence, even if it is unsatisfying. We don’t want to take risks because with risk comes sacrifice, so we’d rather settle for what we already have rather than lose it all.
We resist changing because we know that success is never guaranteed. Taking a risk opens us up to rejection, failure and the thought that we could end up even more unhappy with our lives than we were in the first place. That’s why so many of us choose to play it safe and stay in our comfort zones. We decide it’s better to keep living the way we’ve been living than to get our hands dirty and reach out for more.
Human beings are stubborn. And the reason we’re so stubborn is because we’re conditioned to be that way. Most of us don’t admit to how unhappy we’ve been in our relationship or our career, we don’t deal or cope well with baggage instead we just accept what is and hope for the best. We don’t want to dwell on what’s missing from our lives because it’s easier to just play pretend then have to get real with ourselves and ask those hard questions. Instead we just convince ourselves that we might as well enjoy it while it lasts. Because nothing lasts forever, so just smile and get through the day, because there will always be another tomorrow. Until there’s not.
So here’s a word of advice, change is the answer. Sometimes, change is the only way you’re going to grow.